Can we officially put out a call to end all flash mobs now?

Yesterday, Twitter headquarters hosted that group phenom that continues to destroy humankind with its twee, precious and now sadly predictable effects — the flash mob is this decade’s Macarena. And it needs to stop.

You can see from the video, above, that the Twitter flash mob started during lunch hour, where hundreds of innocent Twitter bystanders, trying to enjoy their presumably grass-fed burgers and organic sodas, were besieged with the horror of the Mob. Worse yet? It was to Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” I don’t know about you, but nothing in this world gets me as psyched for another long afternoon in front of the computer deciphering code and prepping worthless reports for pointless meetings than an 18-year-old trying to woo the ladies.

You will also notice the hundreds of other non-participating Twitter workers, with those horrified, awkward smiles frozen on their faces. These looks say, “I should’ve went to Burger King. I should’ve went to Burger King.”

With its invitation to “Join the Flock,” the video was an attempt at recruiting new bodies, by, ahem, showing smart, young kids just how fun Twitter’s workplace is. For a good laugh, read the comments on YouTube: “The beginning reminded me of a prison cafeteria except every1 had regular clothes on” is a particularly astute one.

Really, Twitter? We don’t know about you, but lunchtime is one of the few times during the workday where we don’t have to be all like, “Yeah! Work!” Flash mobs are mildly annoying at best, excruciating at the worst. And now you, like the Bieb, have ruined our lunch.

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Comments

  • http://www.forgetthesun.com courtneyj

    It really feels like this thing that was weird in cool in 2003 was remembered by a few people now running marketing departments who decided to commercialize it as food for the next generation. It’s no longer quirky and unique, just a blatant attention grab.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Devin-Miller/100001051294818 Devin Miller

    I second that, flash mobs make me cringe. Twitter loses all hipster cred with a Bieber flash mob.

  • TCBigPants

    Wow… this is really awful. Very funny, Molly.

  • DarenG

    Oh please. We live in a world where everything has to be politically correct. Where most people go to work in mundane jobs with no fun. Let them have their flash mob and fun. People there were having fun and smiling which is what counts. Simply don’t watch if you don’t like it. Don’t piss on another persons parade.

  • lalaaa

    I third that. I would expect Microsoft to pull something like this.

    Oh Twitter. I thought you would be better than Justin Bieber.

  • Likeee

    nothing wrong with this attention grab. So what? Relax folks. It was fun to watch it. Let the author of this blog get a credit for expressing an annoyance with the flash mob. This is his job.
    Our job is to enjoy.
    Trust me, you will watch every flash mob of famous company.

  • Peter H

    Here, here.
    The silent fade-in titles are especially pretentious, and massively overestimate the importance of this little event.
    While we’re at it, we need the media to help us. Your former collegues at seattlepi/mynw breathlessly chronicled the ridiculous mobs that happened last summer at Seattle Center … if only they could have seen them correctly as you do here.

  • http://twitter.com/RedRussak Red Russak

    Why??? Oh godd…WHYY? The people in the room with me requested I turn it off immediately. #cringe

  • Knuckles

    That was NOT fun to watch. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

  • Peter H

    Wow this just got even worse.

    Just saw an ad for “Mobbed”, a show on Fox that uses staged Flash Mobs to help people tell secrets and solve family problems. Hosted by Howie Mandel.

    No joke. This looks completely horrible.

  • http://twitter.com/dskendall Scott Kendall

    first the Dick Bar, now this!

  • Mobbstar

    So you think this board will end it. End Justin Bieber instead.

  • ballardbell

    I start to worry when we in Seattle think we hold the standard for what is hip. They all look like they are having fun. Lighten up and let people have their fun.

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